For those of you who may not have read this before and those that know exactly the verses titled as "The Wife of Noble Character", I'm going to start off by posting the verses below and then I'll start on my tangent and some of the tidbits that seem to always linger in my mind.
Proverbs 31:10-31
10 A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
11 Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
12 She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.
13 She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands.
14 She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar.
15 She gets up while it is still night;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her female servants.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17 She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.
18 She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.
19 In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
20 She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.
21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
22 She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.
25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
26 She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
27 She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
31 Honor her for all that her hands have done,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
For those of you that know me personally, my dearest and closest friends know that Handyman and I are in a season of changes in our lives. Without getting into the details, about 2 months ago our "normal lives" got completely flipped upside down. During this time we could have moped around and whined and complained, but "we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him" (Rom 8:28a). So we're looking at this season with the anticipation that God will use it and one day make it clear to us the good things that came from it.
Something that I remember from a sermon serious that one of our old pastors had said was that wives are truly meant to encourage and build up their husbands in words and actions. Our words and actions are so powerful. They can be used in positive ways to build each other up but the wrong words and especially the wrong tones and so quickly tear each other down.
Recently my thoughts have brought me back to this scripture. During this season, am I being the Wife of Noble Character or am I letting the circumstances of our lives manipulate my mood, actions and words?
When I read verses 11 and 12 "Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life" Does my husband have full confidence in me? Do I give him reasons not to? Has anything I've said or done brought him frustration or hardship? If so, that's not noble!
The second things I see about the wife of noble character is that she is NOT idle. (vs 27) She is a busy lady, not a busybody! (2 Thess 3:11) She chooses materials to work with and she works, she sews, she buys vineyards and trades. She works long days and she does not let her work for her family keep her from helping others. (vs. 13-20, 22, 24) In doing so, she is not worried about the welfare of her family because she has worked vigorously to make sure their needs are met. (vs 21) She is able to "laugh at the days to come" (vs 25) because she has worked to be prepared for them! Does it say that she spent a lot of time on Facebook reading up on other peoples lives? Does it say that she spent time on Pinterest pinning ideas to work on, but never actually doing them? (I'm not totally knocking Facebook and Pinterest, but only in moderation after your work is done.)
She is married to a respectable man. (vs 23) I wonder why this verse is added? I mean, we could spend all night talking about what the Bible says about how men should live their lives, but I think it's simple. If a man is living his life following Christ and he is married to a wife of noble character, then he's got a great helpmate. He's not having to carry the load at work and home. He's as good as the woman he is married to! The wife's life affects the character of her husband. Haven't you heard the old saying, "If Momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy." It's unfortunately often times true.
"She speaks with wisdom and faithful instruction is on her tongue." (vs 26) As a mom, my first thought is am I speaking wisdom and faithful instruction to my children, but this scripture is focused on her role as a wife, so the real question here is am I speaking wisdom and faithful instruction to my husband? Am I being thoughtful about the things I suggest? Am I encouraging him in his faith? Or am I quick to say the first thought in my mind without filtering for only the wise and faithful words?
And what is the result of all of this woman's work? Her children and husband call her blessed and praise her. (vs 28) Our husbands are directed to no love us for our beauty and charm, but because we fear the Lord. (vs 30) And then we are to be honored "for all that her hands have done." (vs 31a) Can you think of anything better than knowing you've fulfilled your role as Christ has defined it and doing it so well that your children and husband praise you for it?
My reality is that I am a sinner and so I'm not perfect. I try to encourage Handyman but there are times when maybe my words aren't seasoned with wisdom and faithful instruction. Even just jotting a quick note to say, "I love you. Thank you for all you do for our family." takes 2 seconds, but it's an effort that can be made. It's something that he knows, but I like to reiterate.
Am I as productive as I could be? Nope. No way. Is that where I can improve? Absolutely! Does that mean my home will daily look like it should be featured in a magazine? Of course not, but it means that I will have put forth the effort to manage our household without making it fall so far down on the priority list that things never get done on any day. (When I read these verses I wish that I could sew and garden. I've tried both in the past, but failed miserably. Maybe sewing is not my gift, but maybe it is something that I could learn. I know it's not saying that to be a wife of noble character that you must sew and garden, but it just reminds me that I'd like to know how, but in the past stunk at both.)
Each day there is something that I can do, something that I can improve on and I simply want to use these verses to refine my character so that through each season of our lives, I am growing as a Wife of Noble Character. Are you?
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